The date was June 17, 2011. Our country was still reeling from Anthony Weiner's resignation, and "Green Lantern" had just started disappointing audiences worldwide.
Meanwhile, in Southeast Washington, one of our fair city's recent No. 1 draft picks took to the mound for a ceremonial first pitch. We could not have prepared for what was to come.
John Wall's first pitch was more of a dive bomb into the freshly manicured infield at Nationals Park. It was something that he had to live with for nearly two years.
“I tried to throw a bullet like I was really [Stephen] Strasburg or somebody and it didn't work,” he told reporters after practice Thursday, where he took a few practice throws with teammates. “I just want to make sure I get it to the mound. As long as I don’t hit the dirt, I’m cool. I don’t want it to be like I did last time."
On Thursday, Wall finally earned his redemption.
As with his much-improved jump shot, Wall put plenty of arc on his pitch and it made it over the plate as a result.
"It wasn't a strike, but it was great," he said. "I didn't hit the dirt this time and my ball don't have no stains on it."
This is where I put some sort of zinger, but Wall's "stains" comment is better than anything I could come up with on short notice.
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Photo Credit: @SCREECH